Counselling skills

Beneath all of the psychological theories, treatment techniques, academic research, there are three counselling skills which are fundamental to achieving positive outcomes and which are fundamental to the counselling service I offer. 

Counselling Skills: Empathetic Understanding

Empathetic understanding is a counselling skill which involves the mental ability to fully imagine another's experience. 

Counselling Skills: Unconditional Positive Regard

Unconditional positive regard is a counselling skill which involves viewing a client without personal judgments and preventing negative feelings. This counselling skill involves identifying personal values which result in judgments and identifying personal issues or experiences with result in negative interpretations and feelings.

The counselling skill of unconditional positive regard doesn't mean such thoughts don't exist, it means that these thoughts are recognized and managed. It means we don't let them influence our perspective and therefore influence our approach. We stay focused on the person as a human being wanting the best from life, but struggling to get there. We work to connect with the humanness of the person, and given different certain circumstances in life, we could even find ourselves having similar reactions or behaviors.

The counselling skill of unconditional positive regard does not expect a Counsellor to never experience judgements or negative feelings towards a client, rather this counselling skill requires a Counsellor to develop self-awareness of his or her own values and issues which result in judgements and negative feelings and deconstruct those values and manage those issues in order to view a client with unconditional positive regard. 
Ryan is also an Anti-Bullying Motivational Speaker - presentations to inspire students to stand up against bullying in schools, as well as a Guest Speaker for a variety of other topics. He travels any distance but will speak in Kitchener, Guelph, Hamilton, London, Toronto, Mississauga, Barrie, Markham, St. Catharines, Milton, Oakville, Burlington, Stratford, Owen Sound, Oshawa, Ottawa, Windsor, Kingston, New Market. 

Counselling Skills: Genuineness

Genuineness is a counselling skill which involves a congruency between a Counsellor’s internal experience and his or her external presentation and expression. This counselling skill requires a Counsellor to be comfortable being themselves rather being an idea of “Counsellor” and acting as they believe a Counsellor acts. Most importantly, this counselling skill requires a Counselor to fully accomplish the first two counselling skills so he or she is relates authentically rather than feigning an accepting and supportive demeanor.
The counselling skill of genuineness doesn't imply biting your time and ignoring your feelings, because those feelings come out in one way or another. They can be sensed on some level. The counselling is going genuineness means that you deal with those feelings so you don't have them any longer. Or you have them in less intensity. Counselling skills of empathetic understanding and unconditional positive regard will help you deal with these feelings. Furthermore, a counselor needs to be aware of his or her own personal issues that also influenced feelings interfere with accomplishing any of these counselling skills. The counselor needs to recognize and managed influence of past experiences on his or her feeling in order to accomplish the counselling skill of genuineness.

There are technical counselling skills, such as CBT Therapy (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) and Solution Focused Brief Therapy, which are proven by research to be effective in assisting other people in accomplishing positive outcomes. However, the three counselling skills discussed here must be the foundation of every counselling practice in which the more technical counselling skills are based upon. 

Learn more about How to Choose a Therapist or learn more about all available options for Counselling in Kitchener-Waterloo.